Travel Log: PlanetSide 2 Ultimate Empire Showdown
7:10 AM — I’m in a cab and on my way to the San Francisco International Airport where I’ll be joining Twitch Content Director, Jon Carnage, on a day-trip to LA. There, the PlanetSide 2 Ultimate Empire Showdown awaits. I’m going to try and document the trip as best I can here on the Twitch Official Blog. We’re still in that great, experimental phase where we get to see what works and what doesn’t.
The goal of today’s trip is to meet the folks who are making great use of our Live Streaming SDK, and to hover hand SeaNanners. Stay tuned for awkwardness.
7:30 AM — My driver is a wrestling fan. I’m not sure how we got on the subject, but 90% of my conversations typically wind up with me ranting about “the business.”
“Does the Undertaker still wrestle?”
“Yes, but he’s bald now.”
“Weird.”
7:55 AM — And I’m already through airport security! No sign of Jon. I take seat across from a nice, old lady who looks up and clutches her purse. Apparently I have a case of the “Gonnamugyous.” I’ll have to remember to tell my girlfriend to get herself checked out.
8:05 AM — Enter Jon Carnage. He serenades me with Michael Jackson’s 1995 hit, “You Are Not Alone.” It makes everyone around us feel very uncomfortable. The lady across from us quickly hides her iPad.
8:50 AM — We’ve boarded the plane! We’re flying Southwest today, no complaints. Jon has never flown with them before, so he’s dumbfounded by their seating policy.
“What is this? Lord of the Flies Airlines?”
I remind him of the efficiency of the buddy system.
8:55 AM — Meanwhile, on the internet, Siglemic enjoys a breakfast at McDonalds, while ESPN’s Jon Robinson promotes a story about speedrunning on Twitch.
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A new era of cyber athleticism has arrived. I remind Siglemic that, as his eSports Manager, to keep doing whatever it is he’s doing.
9:05 AM — We’re stuck on the runway and behind schedule. Carnage and I are arguing the semantics surrounding the rules of The Highlander. He’s convinced that, were a baby to become a Highlander, it could absorb the power of other Highlanders who are killed around it. I say that Highlander powers aren’t loot drops and that in order to absorb one’s power, you must slay them by your own hands. Thoughts?
9:10 AM — “So what was The Gift? In the Highlander?”
“Mortality. That and you can feel all living things, as well as read their thoughts.”
“So the ultimate gift is death.”
“The Highlander is so %$*@ing metal.”
9:35 AM — I love SkyMall. I like to believe that, were I an eccentric billionaire, I would do all my frivolous shopping exclusively through SkyMall. For example, check out my sweet, new gaming rig.
10:30 AM — Jon will not stop with this Highlander baby theory. Someone please tell him that, even if there were an 8-month-old Highlander baby, it would not be capable of acquiring powers. And even if it could, it would have no comprehension of what it is. It’s a baby!
“Who are you to doubt The Forever Baby?”
10:50 AM — We’re in a cab. Vanu willing, we’ll make it in one piece.
11:20 AM — We’re here! It’s an empty warehouse. No kidding. It must be a PlanetSide 2 interpretive art project. It’s everything and nothing all at the same time. This is very bold. Pack it up, Peter Molyneux, my curiosity has been spiked by SOE and we’re celebrating in the end zone of life.
11:21 AM — We’ve been informed that the event is at the end of the empty warehouse.
11:25AM — And here it is. They’re still setting up. Jon immediately rushed behind the stage to steal a bagel. I’m pretty sure we weren’t supposed to do that.
11:55AM — Lord Sundance has arrived.
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12:25 PM — A wild table of sandwiches has appeared. They’re wrapped in some sort of clear, protective plastic. I think that means “Don’t eat this,” but we’ve already broken backstage, so, maybe these space-age materials won’t do them much good.
12:35 PM — There’s a pack of savage gamers circling the table of sandwiches. No one wants to be the guy to break the seal.
12:36 PM — SWERVE! Dozens of pizzas have arrived. The flock scatters from the protected sandwiches and begins devouring the cheesy substance with no regard as to what toppings reside on their slice. Somewhere, in the fray, Alex “Goldenboy” Mendez of IPL drips pizza grease on my notepad. Unforgivable.
12:55 PM — I check in with Twitch HQ and our relief social media wizard, Andrew.
“Andrew, is everything ok? Can I keep blogging about sandwiches?”
“Yeah.”
2:15 PM — After a very extended conversation with the vertically enlightened Jace Hall, we’ve come to the conclusion that Jon Carnage’s Forever Baby Highlander Theory™ is indeed, bunk. Jace argues that, were a Highlander baby to gain Quickening, they would indeed acquire that Highlander’s powers, but their brain would still not physically develop, therefor, it would still just simply be a baby. This is, of course, assuming that a baby can actually kill a Highlander.
And then his production crew and I sang the “KIDS Incorporated” theme song. Video games, dear readers.
3:40 PM — Took time out to walk around in the rain and speak with the NY Post about the speed running community. Look for that next week!
I came back in from the soggy, LA streets to see TotalBiscuit screaming about mind wipes and indoctrination. The squeal of the audience like banshees hit me like a Vanu scythe to the dome. Their eyes glazed, they began to thrash about in a zombie-like state. I think the mini-bar ran out of Diet Coke.
4:15 PM — “NEUROTOXINS, WOOOOOOO!”
This is shouted from the main stage. I turn around. Jon is confused.
“Was that Ryan Davis?”
5:40 PM — Jon and I have been running around, trying to do what we can to help SOE. I pulled myself out of the maw of madness and sprang into action, And by “sprang into action,” I mean I called Gunrun in a coiled panic. Sit tight!
5:55 PM — I just saw Athene’s response to our response to his initial letter. Whatever he’s doing in that video, I’m confused, I like it, and I want to see more of it. I’ll have to consider these feelings at a less stressful time.
6:15 PM — Ran over to the stage to catch Lord Sundance making the partnership announcement between Major League Gaming and PlanetSide 2. On my way there I made a cinemagram, or as I like to call them, Harry Potter Photos. Yer a wizard, Sony!
7:20 PM — And we’re on our way back to San Francisco. Thank you to SOE for being such gracious hosts. We plan on capping this trip with a McNugget Speedrun Challenge at LAX. Goodnight, Twitch!